Grieving with Hope

(Due to the sensitive nature of this blog, the author has written anonymously. However, if this story speaks to you and you’d like to talk with author, please contact gabbytilschner@resonate.net.)

2020 is not going like I planned, and I am sad about it. I am in a season of living out of my suitcase, the job I was hired to do is on pause, I can’t see my friends, I don’t even have the comfort of routine. Grieving feels foreign to me. If I believe in a God who does all things for my good and his glory, then why do I have so much sorrow? Yet, here I am with tear streaked cheeks and a sorrow that seems to ache with every passing day at the feet of my very good God. 

Fortunately, the Bible has an abundance of stories of people suffering and grieving. God doesn’t look at their sorrow with contempt or shake his head at their disbelief. He instead sends his son to show us how to grieve well and with hope. 

In John chapter 11, Jesus is sent a message, “‘Lord, he whom you love is ill,’” (John 11:3). He responds with, “‘This illness does not lead to death. It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it,’” (John 11:4).  Jesus arrives a few days later, and the Bible tells us his friend Lazarus had been in the tomb for four days. Both Mary and Martha come to meet Jesus and say the same thing to him: “‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died,’” (John 11:21, 32). 

We see two responses from Jesus. His response to Martha, “‘I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he dies, yet shall live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?’” (John 11:25-26)

He reminds Martha to believe. 

Jesus’ response to Mary, is described as Jesus as he saw  the people weeping and “he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled,” (John 11:33). Jesus asks to be shown where Lazarus has been laid, and in verse 35 it says, “Jesus wept.” 

He wept with Mary.

Jesus did not scold the grieving. He did not roll his eyes at their disbelief. He was not frustrated. He was not annoyed. He did not hold back the tears. 

He was moved with deep sorrow and He wept. He gives gentle, loving reminders of truth.  

But the story wasn’t over. 

In verse 39, “Jesus said, ‘Take away the stone.’ Martha, the sister of the dead man, said to him, ‘Lord by this time there will be an odor, for he has been dead four days.’ Jesus said to her, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?’ Jesus then cries out, “Lazarus, come out.’ The man who had died came out, his hands and feet bound with linen strips, and his face wrapped with a cloth,” (John 11:39-44).

Jesus doesn’t expect hope-filled people to avoid grief. Jesus experienced deep sorrow and wept over the loss of his friend. Even if it was for a short time. Even when he knew he was about to bring him back to life. Even when he knew that good and glory were about to come from the death of the friend he loved. 

Jesus doesn’t tell us to “suck it up because I am about to do some big things.” No, he is moved by our grief and comes alongside us to weep with us. 

He does tell us to grieve with expectancy. He tells us to believe that we will see the glory of God. 

As a follower of Christ, I know that he is doing something for my good and the glory of his name amongst the nations, but I am still filled with grief. I am sad that I am not at home, that I can’t see my friends, that I can’t do my job, that I miss my favorite mug, and the day to day living I had. 

Grieving doesn’t mean doubting. Grieving is the deep sorrow that comes from loss. Some of you lost your health, your job, the last moments of your college career, your graduation ceremonies, plans with friends, the moments of shoulder to shoulder community, or the quiet moments away from kids. Whatever it may be, it was lost, and it is okay to grieve. It’s okay to cry about it. It’s okay to be on your knees and cry out to the One who sees you, who walks with you in this season of sorrow. 

Let us look to the example of Jesus. Let us grieve with the hope of seeing the glory of Christ from a season of sorrow. Let us walk closely with the God who weeps with us into a season of joy of the life that comes from death. He is good and he will be glorified from this season of sorrow, let us expect it. 

Psalm 30:12

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; 

you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, 

that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent. 

O Lord my God I will give thanks to you forever!