He is Worthy to be Above All

Due to the sensitive nature of this blog, the author has written anonymously. However, if this story speaks to you and you’d like to talk with the author, please contact blog@resonate.net

We are not a group of extraordinary people. We are just a hodgepodge group of ordinary people trying to point back to the one who is extraordinary. 

Henri Nouwen, in his talk about the Vulnerable Journey, tells us that our life “is a short opportunity to say, to the God who tells you ‘I love you,’ I love you too.” Putting Jesus above all else is saying to the whole world how much you love Him. For you, that might mean moving to Lethbridge or Ashland this year on a Resonate Church Plant. For you, it might mean saying no to a party that all your friends are going to. For you, it might mean saying “yes” to leading a Resonate Village. For our group, saying “I love you too” meant moving to Asia. 

We started moving to Asia in 2016, with the last of us moving in 2019. Some of us had life-changing moments on a short-term trip as college students. Others had never been to our landing city or country and still moved. We have heard the transforming news of Jesus, and we couldn’t sit by while billions of people are born, living, and dying without ever hearing the redemptive story of Jesus and having the chance to respond back with “I love you too.”

Some assume that when we say we live overseas that we live in a small rural village in a hut without electricity or indoor plumbing. We assure you this is not the case. We live in a big city and have beds, hot showers, and drink our Starbucks coffee. It’s just a little different than life in America. On average, we are taller than all of our neighbors, it’s hard to read the signs around us, and it may take a couple of minutes longer to order food. No matter how much we study the language or learn about culture, we will always remain, and obviously so, outsiders. However, the most significant difference is that it’s 100% unacceptable to be a Christian. Some days we easily forget that fact; other days, some of us anxiously lay in our beds wondering if the police will come to our apartments banging on our doors telling us to get out and never come back. Some of us have had stressful interactions with authorities pertaining to faith and discipleship. Others have seen people who made decisions to follow Jesus walk away because of the pressure of parents, teachers, bosses, or a policing authority. However, we continue to say yes to a life filled with anxiety, fear, and watching our friends walk away because we keep saying, “Yes; I love you too, Jesus, and we desperately want the world to know you.”  

Paul exemplifies the need for the world to know Jesus. He lives a life worthy of the Gospel and in his letter to the Philippians he encourages us to remember that “The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this, I rejoice. Yes, and I will continue to rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and God’s provision of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance. I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death.” (Philippians 1:18b-20) Paul is in prison while writing this yet he rejoices because he knows that the weight of chains is worthy of the Gospel. 

Our life is not our own, it is for the glory of God. The Gospel is worthy to die for because we point back to Jesus in our death. The Gospel is worthy of being persecuted because we point back to Jesus in our persecution. This may mean being an outcast in your sorority because you’re “that Christian girl who’s no fun.” It may mean you’re ‘that guy’ in class who is not seen as ‘smart’ because you are ‘religious’. It may mean your parents roll their eyes when you give up a ‘good’ opportunity in order to support-raise, move to a small college town, and help plant a church.

The question I pose to you, church, is: Are we rejoicing in the honor that comes from putting the Gospel above all else? Are we using our whole life here on earth to tell Jesus, “I love you too”? 

Our group really wishes that we could answer that question with a confident and resounding yes! In reality, we aren’t as radical as people make us out to be when they hear the “m” word—missionary. Jesus doesn’t ask for perfect people, He doesn’t expect excellent skills and He doesn’t expect perfection when we share the Gospel. He asks us to show up and be faithful because guess what — it’s not about us. It’s not about how well we do our jobs, it’s not about what skills we do or do not have, it’s not about how good we are, but it is about Jesus’ perfection and holiness. So, we go to hard places, even if anxiety is a companion we’ve prayed to leave. We stay, though the fear can grip us so tightly, it’s hard to breathe. We remain, against all of our parents begging us to come back to the comforts of a cushioned American bubble. We stay because JESUS is worth it. Jesus is worth the companion of anxiety, worth suffocating fear, worth leaving families and comforts.  

For us, COVID knocked us off our feet. We had to leave our homes, our guitars, our favorite mugs, and our friends. We didn’t expect or want to come back to the States, but here we are. It’s been a season of constant sadness, confusion, frustration, and repentance. It’s easy to believe that God has forgotten us, that He no longer cares or loves us. It’s hard to rejoice in the work He is doing globally when you can’t see it. It’s hard to rejoice when you have to hear racist comments and generalizations about the culture of some of our favorite people, dearest friends, and disciples. It’s difficult to rejoice when you are confused about why you’re in a place with so many reminders of the darkness you once lived in or the scars you try so hard to hide.

We want to encourage you, as the body of Christ, to continue to be people who ask God to search you, to know your hearts, and to “see if there be any grievous way in [you], and lead [you] in the way everlasting!” (Psalm 139:23-24). We want you to be a people who joyfully embrace the suffering so that Christ would be glorified with every aspect of your lives. We want you to be a people who shout to God, “I love you too!” because of the overwhelming knowledge of Christ’s love for you.

Church, ask the hard questions and ask where in your life is there shame to proclaim the Gospel, fear to shout “I love you too,” and sin that is pulling you out of the light of God’s loving grace. Consider these questions: 

· What comfort do you need to surrender to God?

· Where in your life is there fear to share the Gospel?

· Where in your life are you giving into worldly pressures instead of joyful obedience to Jesus?

· How far are you willing to go to ensure the world may know the name of Jesus? 

For us, the vulnerable journey is not over and does not end in Asia. In the fall of 2019, our team was asked to consider moving to Vancouver B.C., in which the details of that story will have to be shared later. We all have individual, different stories of how we gave our yes. We will say it was not with grace nor joyful “I love you too’s”, but with a lot of wrestling, sadness, and even anger. One of us even exclaimed, “I’m not moving until I at least lose an arm!” We desperately wish that we can stand with confidence giving a yes with grace, maturity, and joy to leave Asia. But we fought hard, angrily prayed to stay, and quickly forgot to say, “Yes, I love you too.” But because of God’s loving grace, because of the sweet reminders that Jesus first says, “I love you and died for these moments of disobedience,” we were moved to give our “Yes, I will go because I love you too.” When we said yes to Jesus, we said yes to a life of joyful obedience. Even to move away from a place we now call home, ensuring the Gospel is shared in a city that seems scary and hard for us. 

Jesus, we love you too. Never stop asking us to go to hard places, never stop leading us through the fiery furnaces because you are so worth following even when there is pain, fear, and anxiety. If you can die a death meant for us because you loved us, why shouldn’t we give our whole life, even our death for the sake of your glory, to say I love you too? If you can come, wrapped in human flesh to suffer for us, we can suffer for your glory and our reward. Help us to remember your love and to lead us to be people who “Only let [our] manner of life be worthy of the Gospel of Christ...standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the Gospel” - Philippians 1:27.